MOVIE REVIEWS

The central romance around which the """plot""" of _Ibiza_ revolves is, in all honesty, actually kind of sweet. But this might be the most self-indulgent, vain crap I've ever watched. So awkward. _Final rating:★★ - Had some things that appeal to me, but a poor finished product._

Music can make or break a film. A good soundtrack can count for a lot. It sets the atmosphere, it sets the tone, it's the heart of a film. Look at Guardians of the Galaxy 2, not a great film...but the soundtrack saved it from being a bad film. Then look at ibiza...the sound track is largely why the movie stank. And when I mean it stank, I mean it was so bad I literally had to leave the room my girlfriend was watching it in, and go someplace to escape it. The main reason was the music. It was blaring, so loud that you couldn't escape it...and if you turned the volume down it became so quiet you couldn't hear the dialogue...which really, honestly, you wouldn't be missing much. But what you have here are tits...then blaring house music, the kind that is just three beats, on repeat, on a drum machine and played so loud that it shuts down your ability to even think...then dialogue, then House music again. And here and there you have actual songs...with drum machines and auto-tune so it sounds, pretty much, exactly like every other song you hear on the radio today...only again played at 10X the volume as the rest of the film. What was the film about? Who cares? Seriously. The brief lulls between the blaring horrible music were little more than small reprieves before the next round of annoying as all hell music. I've seen plenty of horrible movies...but I've never seen a single film that irritated me as much as this train wreck. If you're the kind of person that likes music that sounds like a scratched CD played at ear popping volumes, this is the movie you deserve.